Explaining to Children about Euthanasia of a Pet
Use age-appropriate terms and avoid euphemisms
The finality of death is a difficult concept, especially for children under the age of 5 or so. It is best to talk in honest terms, at an appropriate level of detail for the child's age. Very small children need to know that this is final - the pet isn't going to wake up or come back. To say that the pet "went away" or is "in heaven" without offering any other details can also confuse children. Telling children that euthanasia or death is like ”going to sleep” may trigger sleeping problems. Older children need to know the reasons why this decision is being made, and why it is humane for the suffering animal.
Dealing with difficult emotions
To be or not to be present at the actual euthanasia is a personal decision that should be discussed with your veterinarian. Some veterinarians believe children under the age of 5 should not be present for the actual euthanasia. This is because very young children have a hard enough time understanding the concept of death and that witnessing the event may not necessarily make it easier to understand or cope. Children of all ages may have difficulty understanding the reasons why and the emotions involved with the act of euthanasia.
When you're explaining why a pet must undergo euthanasia, let children know it's okay to be sad. You can show them the logic of relieving the pet's pain, but you must expect them to react emotionally.
Helping Children Deal with their Grief
- Remembering the deceased pet
It is important never to belittle or ignore the child's relationship with the deceased pet. It does not matter how small or "insignificant" the pet may seem to adults. Pets are often very real friends for children - they warrant true feelings and emotions too! - Closure
Having a burial, memorial, or similar ceremony helps to reinforce the importance of the pet's life and mark the death event. See some of the ways that you can memorialise your pet here. Children should be allowed to participate in whatever way is appropriate - helping mark the grave site, decorate the urn of ashes, or draw pictures of happy times together with the pet - whatever activity allows the child to say goodbye in their own special way. - Getting a new pet
This is a very personal choice. Children should not be rushed into getting another pet to help them "get over" the deceased pet. One pet does not replace another, and getting a new pet too soon may only cause the child to resent (even mistreat) the new pet. Only once the child can speak openly about the deceased pet and shows interest in a new pet should the subject of a new pet be discussed.
Find out more about the euthanasia process here. If you have further questions regarding euthanasia, please do not hesitate to phone us at (06) 358 8675 to discuss the process a little more with one of our friendly team members.
Parts of this article have been adapted from http://vetmedicine.about.com/od/lossandgrief/a/PetLossAndKids.htm